Do women and men behave differently after experiencing conflict?

One interesting attempt to answer that question was a study of four sports in 44 countries. The study found men were far more likely to engage in friendly physical contact—handshakes, back pats, and hugs—after a competition than women were.

This conclusion, based on animal studies and assumptions of early human behavior, contends that females focused on family relationships and had a few close friends, while males actively cultivated large friendship networks. From this, the researchers concluded women frequently reconciled with family and close friends, while men more typically reconciled with a larger number of unrelated same-sex peers.

The researchers go one step further to suggest current studies support the observation that when women compete in the workplace the aftermath of possible reconciliation is more challenging after a disagreement than it is for men.

The researcher’s observations also suggest that in mediation women may place greater value on resolution with close relationships compared to casual and professional ones, while men may reconcile more indiscriminately.

In other words, reconciliation may have a significant contextual meaning and value for women and a more transactional one for men.

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Fred Jandt is the author of “How to Survive a Mediation,” available now at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and wherever books are sold.

Every mediator knows many people come to a mediation with only one outcome in mind and are usually ready to fight for that result.

With this in mind, most mediators work to help disputants consider other acceptable outcomes.

This is an example where the use of Artificial Intelligence (AI) for suggestions of different posiible resolutions can be an effective tool. For example, I asked this simple question: “My neighbor’s dog bit my son requiring $230 in medical expenses. My son went into her yard to retrieve a ball. My neighbor says my son has been teasing her dog. How can I handle this in mediation?”

Most people would go into the mediation demanding $230 and be willing to compromise.

ChatGPT, an AI platform, proved to be a good preparation coach:

1 – Contended that dog owners are legally liable, but entering the yard and teasing the dog could reduce liability

2 – Suggested what evidence to gather, such as bills, photos, and witnesses.

3 – Suggested wording to cooperatively respond to the teasing allegation without admitting fault.

4 – Suggested items to discuss, such as fencing, warning signs, educating the child, notifications to enter yard.

5 – Suggested behaviors in mediation, such as staying calm, not arguing, allowing the mediator to guide the discussion.

A mediator would still be required to guide the process, but AI “coaching” before a mediation can open up disputants to alternative solutions and provide guidelines for a more productive mediation.

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Fred Jandt is the author of “How to Survive a Mediation,” available now at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and wherever books are sold.