Recent news reports identified Qatar as the mediator to resolve the Israel/Hamas hostage situation.

Qatar is located on a peninsula bordering the Persian Gulf and Saudi Arabia. It is country of some 2.5 million people ruled by an absolute monarchy. Qatar has “Major Non-NATO Ally” status with the U.S., which includes defense, trade, and security cooperation. The country hosts the regional headquarters for the U.S. Central Command and more than 8,000 U.S. military forces at various facilities, including the Al Udeid Air Base.

In the past, Qatar has acted as a mediator in regional conflicts involving Yemen in 2007, Lebanon in 2008, and more recently Afghanistan. How has this small state in a region of large forces been successful as a mediator? In the Middle East the larger players need a representative to deal with conflicting parties that’s neutral and can serve as an intermediary..

Qatar is following the tradition of small states taking on such a role. For example, Singapore provided the venue for talks between China and Taiwan in 2015 and between the U.S. and North Korea in 2018. Singapore’s Foreign Minister described the key to his country’s policy as neutrality. Norway has also acted in such a capacity for decades.

Some scholars have argued the small states actually have an advantage to act as mediators. Their neutrality makes them non-threatening and in fact, it can be argued their neutrality provides them with a unique type of power far greater than their size would suggest.

The key for any mediator or peace advocate is just that because only neutrality can facilitate peace.

The end of the calendar year brings receptions, office parties, and family gatherings, which can also bring awkward and unfortunate confrontations.

Here are some tips for dealing with such moments:

Most likely your objective is to greet friends and family and to have a pleasant time. With that intent, it’s completely fine at a gathering to simply avoid confrontations. Move on. Let it go.

But what if someone is publicly misstating things you believe to be true or expressing opinions you strongly disagree with? To be true to yourself it’s completely fine to say something like, “I disagree, but now’s not the time to get into it. Let’s move on.”

Other people may feel more comfortable with a response that acknowledges hearing the remark, but not expressing disagreement at the time. Something like, “I hear that’s really important to you.” Such a response by acknowledging the person oftentimes is enough to bring the confrontation to an end.

Overall, remember the only thing you actually control is your own reaction. You can’t stop a co-worker or relative from being confrontational. You can only mindfully control your response. Remember, it’s only for a few hours at most and you have more important things to deal with. Take a deep breath, be tolerant, and focus on things you’re grateful for.

Enjoy the holidays, the office party, and the family get togethers.