Recently I got a call from a colleague who said he and his wife had separated and he was headed to family court mediation. He asked, "What am I getting into?"

That just brought to mind how little most people know about mediation much less family court mediation.

Years ago a former student did a poll of people waiting in grocery lines as to what they knew about mediation.

Most said they didn't really know what it was--and one clearly stated "it's when you close your eyes and try to clear your mind."

It remains my mission to help people understand that mediation is a way disputing parties can resolve their own disputes with the guidance of a neutral third party.

Apologies can be an important part of conflict resolution.

But to be effective, an apology has to do several things:

Identify the parties involved

Acknowledge the behaviors involved

Recognize the impact those behaviors had on the victim

Confirm the behaviors were a violation of some social or moral contract

Communicate true remorse with sincerity and honesty

Offer explanations

Make reparations

In his first public statement, United Airlines CEO Munoz blamed the incident the passenger who had "defied" security officers and that there were lessons the company could learn.

He stressed that he "emphatically" stood behind his employees.

Any surprise there has been such a negative response to his first "apology"?